| you know what's funny?
you know you've hit rock bottom when the people that you care about treat you like the person that they would complain and bitch to you about. now i know what it feels like to be that person. funny cause that person actually called her self a bitch and did something really drastic with a malicious intent while i was just being me with my own major character flaws. maybe i'm wrong. who knows. maybe i did that one bitchy thing that is just as worse but i would love to know what so that i can try to fix it. say sorry even though that word means close to nothing for some people. i really am sorry, but there are only so many times i can apologize. and i don't want to apologize until i know what i did wrong. because i know i've done a lot of things wrong and maybe all that just lumped together and no one can see past it. maybe i am a horrible person. i just give up.
i'm officially not goignt o post anymore because all this thing has ever done for me is get me into trouble. this will be the last time.
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| and people say i'm hard to get along with...
right...
i'm sure i'm a pain in the ass.
i guess that's why people only come to me now just for shit.
ah oh well.
i'm sure they'll stop needing shit and leave me alone eventually.
i'll still help and what not, but i'll stop asking people to chill. after all it's pointless.
guess i was a real jackass to deserve this yea?
i guess i was.
sorry i guess... yet these are usually the people that tell me to stop saying sorry. so i guess i'm not. just listening to you.
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| =]
i think i just had one of the best weekends i've had in forever.
saturday- filmed the spirit of troy marching band. got field access. that was pretty amazing. thank you alisa!
sunday- went to film the women's national football team, and met 3 of the players. thank you julie!
but the thing that ruined it was at the end of sunday, i come back to school of architecture, and i'm just reminded of why i don't wanna be here anymore. people are very uh.. "self-efficient" good term for it no? it wasn't cause i had to come into studio to do work. or the fact that I have a lot of work left to do. nope. i actually kind of look forward to the work. just to get away from some of these self efficient people.
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| "...DO EVERYTHING!
Why be good or great at only one thing when you are capable of more?
Remember that I may not be the best example of a college student.
1) 5 years to get an AA
2) 7 years to get a BA
3) I'm 21 years out of high school and I've spent 14+ years in higher education ( 7 colleges, 1 institute, 3 universities, 5 degrees, 10+ majors, etc.)...
In the end, the decision must be yours. Just remember that right now, you have all the time in the world because your still at the start of your "real" life. And remember that shit happens and you may have to adapt, overcome, and change plans.
McLoy"
i don't have an idol, but there are definitely people i look up to. that inspire me. there is a reason why people come into your life. they can change your out look on life. and for me, it's usually not the people that don't do things the "normal" way.
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| packed.
moved.
nice view.
i really do miss him...
only reason why i'd keep up with football.
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